Tis the season to be feasty beasts.
Fruitcake. Fudge. Linzer cookies. Strufuli.*
Arid orbs of prescription cat food.
You can’t blame Angel. People are talking about things like pie-making parties and gingerbread houses. People have been increasing in girth since late November.
People are eating like feasty, feasty beasts.
But cats can’t taste sweet things, and so all this confectionery craziness is lost on them.
The urge to feast, however, is universal.
So we think Angel was just getting in the season this morning when the box arrived. Like an unassuming cardboard gingerbread house, the box stood tall in the Tabby’s Place lobby. Merry little elf-style, Angel got to work consuming the box.
Consuming. The. Box.
Where teeth failed, claws helped. Finally, she was in. Box vanquished, Angel could get to the important work of shredding its contents.
Those contents just happened to be several large bags of dry prescription cat food.
No snowflake cookie has ever been so eagerly ambushed as this medically-approved chow. In a flash, Angel had pierced every last bag, sending tiny, dry-as-dust kibble orbs rolling in all directions. Santa could keep his sack of toys; these were the bags on Angel’s list. Once the food was loose, however, Angel turned away. Now it was on the floor, ergo dirty, ergo beneath her.
Ergo, perfect for one feasty Maggie.
What Angel abandoned, Maggie munched. It was a personal cookie party, no invitation needed, and the feast was on.
A certain Tabby’s Place staff member — let’s call him Ronathan to protect the innocent — watched all this. It was all Ronathan could do to stop laughing long enough to stop the cats from “liberating” every last kibble.
The moral of the story: cats don’t love prescription cat food, unless it comes disguised as a Christmas surprise.
So, although we lack photos of this morning’s feast, today’s gratuitous cat photos honor the two queens who made the most of their munchical moment.
Feast on, my beasty friends.
*The favorite in mi famiglia. If you know strufuli, I love you and we should be best friends this instant.
Photo credits from de top: Heather, Mark, Heather, Mark.