The Wolf of Route 202

The Wolf of Route 202

photo-1You may think you’ve heard this story before.

You may rub your eyes to be sure you haven’t seen this face before.

A love montage by one of Wolfie's heroines. Every day is Valentine's Day between these two: when she came to visit Wolfie, he melted into her arms like a Cadbury egg on the equator.
A love montage by one of Wolfie’s heroines. Every day is Valentine’s Day between these two: when she came to visit Wolfie, he melted into her arms like a Cadbury egg on the equator.

But kittens, you ain’t never seen nothin’ like Wolfie.

Wolfie is the guy who can use a triple negative and make it sound smart. Wolfie is the fella who gulps five burgers at Five Guys and makes it look classy. Wolfie is the guy who starts beatboxing at the opera and convinces the baritone to join in.

Wolfie is Tabby’s Place’s newest FIV+ cat.

Shaped like a tuber and patterned like a Nuttin‘, Wolfie is one solid specimen. He’s also turning everything in his grasp to solid gold — except our hearts, which he’s turning to a liquid pool of simpering goo.

He’s got hints of Nuttin’ and tinges of the Godfather, but this big guy is no baddie. Think of Wolfie as a Cadbury egg: very round, kinda hard on the outside…and once you get inside, all you can do is lay on the floor in a sweetness coma of infinite bliss.

If Wolfie is a benevolent Don, Mimi is his consigliere. Different though they may be, the girl with all the likes and the boy with all the poundage come from the same stock — literally. Like Mimi, Wolfie was found at the Ft. Dix military prison. Like Mimi, Wolfie’s got eyelid issues (eyelid agenesis for her, entropion for him, surgeries all around). We think it’s almost certain that they share some DNA.

img_20131220_073450-1Like Mimi, Wolfie’s also been busy accumulating adorers. No One Direction fan ever gave as much of her soul to those singsongy Brit boys as Wolfie’s heroines did to our pudgy potentate. The wonderwomen in Wolfie’s life couldn’t bear the possibility of him languishing in a shelter — or worse, vanishing from it the way Special Needs cats sometimes do — and so they did the exceptional, as in the Exceptional Circumstances Program. We are in perpetual awe of these extraordinary souls.

Wolfie doesn’t concern himself with details. If he’s a whiskered Charlemagne over the holy Tabby’s empire, he’s got larger concerns. (Take the money, he’d say; leave the cannoli.) First on that list is commanding the allegiance and swoony adoration of every last human bean in New Jersey. OK, actually that’s second on his list. First on his list is consuming spectacular amounts of edibles. But our love is a close second.

And we’ll take it, with gooey gratitude. Wolfie, we are yours. You’re the king of the world.

Photo credits from de top: Karina, Wolfie’s epic awesome heroine x2

4 thoughts on “The Wolf of Route 202

  1. Oh, I’m in trouble with this boy – it’s large tote bag time! (that means sneaking him into the tote bag and bringing him home with no one seeing me!!!!) What a love!

  2. The first time I met Wolfie he was lying in a litter box inside a cage. I was straightening his covers next to where he was lying in hopes he’d want to leave the litter box for a softer place to lie. Wolfie started hissing at me. So I am glad to now know he is a nice kitty after all!

Leave a Reply