There’s a hole in the world today.
If you trace the outline, that hole has many colors, many toes…and it’s being filled to the brim with too many tears.This was not the post I wanted to post today. This was not the post you wanted to read. And this was certainly not the news we prayed for.
Our gentle Lacey has left this world.
It had been a
rough hellacious September for Lace: bleeding of unknown origin, anemia of unremitting assault. A few hours after the Special Update we sent her sponsors last night, Lacey’s red blood cells fled yet again. This, in itself, was worrisome. The specialists treated her with yet another blood transfusion.
But this time, something was different. Lacey had a swift and dreadful reaction to the transfusion, and swirled down in a spiral we couldn’t stop. With many tears and shattered hearts, our team made the decision to gently let her go.
It would be an understatement to say that we’re devastated. The void at Tabby’s Place is palpable. It’s as though we have a gaping wound in the size and shape of one many-toed torbie, and all our hearts are sighing into that black hole.
If there is any comfort in these dark early hours of grief, it’s the confidence that Lacey was loved to the utmost. I don’t mean just at Tabby’s Place — though we loved her with all our might. The love that carried Lacey started long before we met her, and will continue long beyond our horizon.
Lacey’s unfailing sweetness was the echo of that love. She who has been loved much, loves much — and Lacey had her Ph.D. in love.
Sometime early in her life, Lacey started collecting uncommon kindness. It’s a special human who will notice a lonely stray cat; it’s a magnificent human who will take such a cat in; but it’s a nearly-heavenly human who will open heart and home to a cat who is aging, aching and incontinent.
That’s the kind of humans Lacey found.
Lacey’s heroes got her into Tabby’s Place, and so our great joy began. Lacey delighted in the devotion of Denise and our whole smitten team. While we all love all of our cats, Lacey had a way of forging a unique bond with each individual staff member and volunteer.
She was “just” one cat, but she changed our world.
One of Lacey’s greatest lessons was grace under pressure — well, frankly, grace under everything. Lacey was happiest when being lavished with love and treats, but even in trying times, her sweetness never wavered. Through constipation and diarrhea, miles of medications, heckling from Harvest and mockery from Miriam, Lacey…was…love.
I suppose that’s why this “goodbye” is so searing. Every loss is different and terrible. But with Lacey, we’ve lost one so pure in heart that it almost seemed she’d live forever.
And that’s the second, sturdier comfort on this awful day.
I believe, with all my might and all my soul, that Lacey lives on. Much more than that, I believe that Lacey will be raised to life again, whole and happy and more beautiful than we can even imagine, in the place where death is defeated. We were blessed beyond description to love her here; we will rejoice with all our hearts to hold her again there. Much as we loved Lacey, God loves her more, and God holds her still.
Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God.
In the meantime, we grieve and groan, for reunion and redemption.
Thank you for not letting us grieve alone, dear ones. Words cannot begin to express my gratitude to you for loving, celebrating and grieving Lacey with us.
It’s not an easy business, this love thing. Life would be much cleaner, neater, easier, if we could shut it off.
But life wouldn’t be any sort of living thing under those circumstances.
I’ll take the loss if it’s soldered to love. And I’ll take the trust that love is leading us to life everlasting — for you, for me, and for the Lacey we long for.