Happy August, Team Moo Moo!

There’s been a lot of mischief going on in the Lobby this summer. Door running has been on the rise. There have been timeouts given for fighting, and sightings of lobby cats in forbidden hallways.

And then there’s me. Formerly known as the Queen of Napping, my new moniker is Cat Burglar Extraordinaire. Let’s just say it, I’m a lobby legend! Along with my accomplice, Colonel Peabody, I planned and pulled off The Great 2025 Closet Caper.

After the epic fail of my attempt to pilfer Greenies Pill Pockets for myself and my friends last month, I knew I needed a better plan. Toys and treats abound here at Tabby’s Place. I knew another opportunity to get extras would present itself.

You know what they say: watch out for the quiet ones. While my counterparts sprinted and wrestled the summer days away, I watched and learned. In my ongoing pursuit to be a more cultured cat and find beauty in the world around me… I spied with my little eye a beautiful storage closet. I’ve seen lots of items emerge from it, treats being one of them. I had to learn how the staff opened it. Keen observation and perfect timing would be necessary to get in there. 

The opportunity presented itself last month. I conspired with Colonel Peabody for an evening of cat burglary. I probably could have chosen a better accomplice. I was overly influenced by the fact that Peabody’s fur pattern made him look the part. That, and he was so eager to be involved that I couldn’t say no.

Peabody is paraplegic. He scoots around at lightning speed, but his back legs don’t work for jumping. That left me to do all the shelf climbing. Being a little “plus size” made it difficult for me to navigate the tight spaces without knocking things over.

We were discovered inside the stationery closet with the door ajar and damaged goods on the floor. We managed to get into a nice, large package of kibble, and scatter it around. I’d like to say that we were embarrassed, but we were actually pretty pleased with ourselves for pulling it off.

Someone said that because I was a repeat offender, I needed to pose for a mug shot. Correspondent Nancy always tells me that I have such a cute mug.

She’s especially enamored of my fur pattern, which gives the illusion of high cheekbones. She says it gives me a patrician beauty. I really don’t know what she means by that. I’ve never met a cat named Patricia.

I heard someone else laugh and say that maybe I should be sent to the big house. I got pretty excited for a minute. Was it possible I was getting adopted by someone who lives in a big house? Think of all the windows! Honestly, if someone falls in love with me and wants to take me home, I don’t care what size their home is. I don’t take up much space. My needs are small. I just want to give my heart to someone who loves me. Alas, they were talking about prison. Sigh.

I knew they were only joking. None of us ever gets in trouble here. We’re loved unconditionally.

In an effort to make amends, I’m making a point of working extra hard at my job as the Medication Dispensing Assistant. I’m staying on top of things these days, and it’s not just on top of the binder. It’s a stretch, but now I extend myself to also cover additional paperwork and stethoscopes.

Speaking of medical issues, I had one this month. For a few days, I had nausea and vomiting. It resolved without my needing intervention from the veterinary staff. Rest assured that it didn’t coincide with the extra treats I ate during the break-in. It happened before that event. The extra kibbles didn’t upset my tummy one bit. Extra kibbles can only bring happiness.

My upset tummy was probably just a furball that needed to be coughed up. Other than that, I’m continuing to feel well. Thank you so much, dear sponsor, for what you do to help me stay healthy. I love you for caring about me. If I could have, I would have saved you a ton of kibbles from the heist.

Love,
Moo Moo
(With help from your correspondent, Nancy)